You’ve Got to See This Woman’s Incredible Penis Cuisine Food Blog

Phallic Shape Inspired Party Food by a Blogger which is trending


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Cockamole and chips

Peen cuisine

What is the best way to make a bachelor party more risqué and raunchy? One of the easiest ways is to make the food more suggestive and what better way than to make phallic shaped party food. One food blogger has apparently found the idea to be quite inspiring so much so that she dedicated a whole blog solely on these ideas. Lauren Hom, the 27 year old blogger and branding specialist having worked for clients like Google and AT&T had this epiphany once she was conversing with friends. According to her interview to the Cosmopolitan she commented “I wondered if cave men used to see dick-shaped rocks and chuckle to themselves or if this was something relatively new”. This thought started the cogs of her mind turning and she suddenly thought about the hilarious side of this whole thing.

The whole Peen Cuisine blog is her brain child and she is proud to be creating new recipes on the blog almost on weekly basis or as soon as possible. Her motto is “Work hard, snack often” and living true to her words she started this blog page. The idea of fusing penis shaped food to her vegetarian palette is seemingly creating quite a buzz as it is something unusual and quite amusing in its own right. She did not only want the food to be aesthetically accurate but also big on taste so that people could actually enjoy their snacking. Hom actually joked about the fact that her blog is a “meat free meat blog” as all the recipes are entirely vegetarian in nature. The recipes shared are very easy to make and do not require several ingredients to make. As according to Hom “people should be able to enjoy dicks every day, not just at bachelorette parties”.

The story behind the blog’s name

The story behind the blog’s name is just as interesting as the idea of marrying phallus shaped food to snacks. Hom actually uploaded a picture on her instagram account which read “Foods before Dudes”. One of the commenters really made her crack up by commenting “cuisine before peen”. Hom was so much inspired by the witty comment that she registered it to her memory lest she might need some inspiration to name her blog. In Hom’s words “…it was so damn clever, that I made a mental note of it”. It was a wily play on words and perfectly summed up the idea and suggested the theme of the blog pretty well; hence the name Peen Cuisine was chosen.

Hom managed to track down the woman, the commenter who inspired the name of the blog in order to thank her for her wit and how her comment stimulated Hom on her latest project. Hom actually took her to dinner and told her all about the blog and the intentions of making a cooking blog which is full of sexual innuendos. Both of them met up in San Francisco for dinner and according to Hom she was a very “cool” individual. Someone she imagined to have a sharp wit to come up with such a comment as “cuisine before peen”.

The blog offers interesting read

Zupeeni Fritters

Peen Cuisine

It is not just the name of the blog which is an ingenious take on the words; the whole blog is actually filled with interesting puns and innuendos that are amusing. The recipe for ‘Zupeeni Fritters’ instructs the reader to mix all the ingredients like it is the “70s swinger party”. The recipe for ‘Pear and Gorgonzola Peenza’ refers to the dough as ‘flaccid’ and instructs the reader to work it and “knead that dough like you are in the backseat of a Kia”. Another one in the ‘creamed puff recipe’ says that you will know when to move onto the next step when the dough firms up and “…pulls away from the sides of the pan (like your boyfriend when you ask him about his ex)”. Each recipe is carrying that surprisingly subtle yet amusing innuendo which is certain to put a smile on your face. The recipes themselves are super easy to follow and will make even the worst cook make it look stress-free and can show off their skills.

Pear and gorgonzola peenza

Peen Cuisine

Blueberry creamed puffs

Peen Cuisine

According to Lauren Hom her personal favorite recipe is ‘Fried Tofu with Peen-nut Sauce’ because it is the easiest to assemble and the least complicated of all the dishes mentioned on the blog. According to her the sauce could be used with every snack and is really delicious. The other recipe she thought worth mentioning is ‘Pear and Gorgonzola Peenza’ which takes little time to prepare allowing you to have less time in the kitchen and more time with friends. It is not only a great party food but a complete dinner in its own right. There are new recipes in the making which will soon be shared on the blog namely ‘Egg Bene-Dicked’ and ‘Spinach and Artichoke Me Harder Dip’.

Aesthetic appeal is necessary

Accessories used

silicone penis moulds

What is the future like for Peen Cuisine?

Hom want to turn Peen Cuisine into a cook book. She also plans to make a YouTube channel for sharing her recipes in a more friendly and entertaining manner. The main aim is to get a collection of recipes which would incorporate the idea of penis shaped food that one could enjoy any time anywhere. This one of a kind food blog was something which she and her friends thought should have been there already. There are new recipes published every week with a bonus sex ‘tip’ (cough) as well.

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