Having sex in the pool or hot tub and on the beach sounds like a perfectly naughty and romantic experience, right? Hollywood has continually featured our favorite stars rolling around in the sand or getting down and dirty in the pool. There’s nothing like getting your partner nice and wet while sharing your sexual escapades.
Sorry to burst your bubble, but sex in any body of water isn’t the best idea and should probably be avoided at all costs. There are hundreds of reasons why you should stick to having sex as far on shore as you can get. Here are just a few of them.
10. Pool Water Doesn’t Lubricate
No matter how aroused and ready for action you are, the water in pools and hot tubs can have a chilling effect on your body. Pool water can wash away some of the natural lube the human body has perfected. In addition, you’ll read in #9 about how pools are the exact opposite of a perfect sex environment.
9. Pool Surfaces Are Not Forgiving
8. How Chlorinated Water Affects The Ladies
Guys tend to be the ones who are pushing for playtime in the pool. Ladies, the chlorine might be affecting you the most because it will affect your body’s PH balance. This will put you at more of a risk for infection than your partner. Not to mention #7’s discussion of bodily fluids.
7. Urine Deep Trouble
Researchers have discovered that an average commercial size swimming pool contains about 20 gallons of pee. This means the average household or hotel pool will have around two gallons of someone else’s urine. The result can be fatal if the pool is chlorinated, as you’ll learn in #6.
6. Chlorinated Pee
When pool chlorine and urine mix, the result can be a toxic chemical compound. One of the more brutal compounds is called nitrosamines. This specific one has been known to cause cancer. Although the risk is associated with long-term swimmers, it still isn’t worth the risk for one sexual experience.
5. Hot Tubs Versus Condoms
Hot tubs have a certain way of making people aroused and ready for action. There’s something about the piping hot water and relaxation. Hot tubs with chlorine can also render condoms useless. Don’t fall for the old wives tale about them preventing STDs and eliminating bacteria, as we’ll discuss in #4.
4. Bacteria To The Future
The bacteria build up in hot tubs will not only cause problems during sex, they can severely affect you when you’re simply wading in the water. Even the shortest hot tub experience can cause different infections. The small pool can become a cesspool of nasty bugs just waiting to invade your body.
3. The Jersey Whore
The Jersey Shore was an insanely popular show about a group of housemates getting it on at the club. Sometimes the party would be brought back to the house where the hot tub was shared and abused between the cast. Head over to #2 to find out why the beach isn’t much of a better option.
2. Sex On The Beach
Hollywood has a way of turning sex on the beach into a beautifully risky moment between protagonists. The one thing you should keep in mind before you decide to get busy on the shoreline is sand. Ten minutes in heaven can turn into ten hours of digging sand out of places you never thought you had.
1. Ocean Sex
The same rule applies to having sex in the ocean, too. The ocean is the final resting place of humanity’s disgusting byproducts. Trash, runoff, and animal excrement; you’re basically marinating in nature’s waste. Think about this when you’re thinking of skinny dipping in the local lake with your partner.
If you didn’t cringe during half of these reasons for not having sex in the pool or hot tub, we’ve lost hope. If you didn’t almost puke at the prospect of getting down and dirty in the ocean or on the beach, you have problems.
As romantic and sexy as it sounds, having sex by a body of water can have some lasting drastic effects on your body. From the infections caused by millions of bacteria to hours of picking sand particles from the nether regions. Sex by a body of water is just a stupid idea. Stick to the bedrooms and drier public places.